Tattoo

Tattoo

Sunday, February 17, 2013

Domestic Sundays

Well. Here we are. The second last day of "K" being here. She made french toast this morning for breakfast and I just finished making meat sauce to put in the lasagna she is going to make for dinner. Dessert will be Blizzards from DQ.

It has been an amazing visit. There has been a lot of laughter. And a few tears. We have been out together and have also spent a lot of time at home.

We went to my staff party. Sat with my buddy "M". And her boyfriend "D". Awesome folks! I actually had a good time! And "K" was the hottest chick there. I was very proud to show up with her on my arm. We did get a few looks but that is totally OK. I like making people look. I like making them feel slightly uncomfortable. Shake up their world a bit.  Make them think outside the box.

I think the big thing was the talk we had about me transitioning. It is after all, a huge thing. It is not that she isn't  OK with it. She is. But she is still unsure if she wants to be in a relationship with someone who is transitioning. She is scared of who I might become. Afraid of the physical changes I will be going through. But she is willing to try. And willing to see where the future takes us. Be that together as a couple or as just friends. I guess that is all I can really hope for right now. I care enough about her that I want to see where this goes.

And to be honest, I don't see my transitioning as the biggest roadblock right now. I see the distance between us being the problem. It is an awful long commute for the two of us. One of us could move. But it would mean sacrificing  good jobs and comfort levels. I don't want to live on the lower mainland. Too crowed. Too many people. Too much traffic. I know that bothers a lot of you. It is a nice place to visit but I can't see myself living there. She feels the same way about here. Only it is too small. Plus it is too cold for her. Though, we have had spring like weather this week.  I know I can't make the money I am making now if I move there and she can't make a living here. It is going to be a tough road ahead. I guess all we can do is wait and see.

This is not a very long blog. I just needed to get a few thoughts out.

Bro code Article # 31

When on the prowl, a Bro hits on the hottest chick first because you just never know.

Dustin.

Saturday, February 9, 2013

Let me introduce myself,,,,

My name is Dustin Tanner Carnell.

And in a few weeks, I will have the paperwork to prove it.

*HAPPY DANCE *

I don't care if men do or don't do happy dances. I am doing one anyway.

I have worked long and hard to get my name changed. First, I had to figure out my name. For those of you who don't know and are wondering, here is a brief story for you.

I had a dream over a year ago and all I can remember is the name Dustin was being used in it. And I seem to remember me answering to it. When I woke up and said the name out loud, I liked the way it sounded. And it just felt right. Every time my mind drifted, the name would pop into my head. So I figured it was destined to be my name.

My second name is a family name that has a lot of meaning to one of my cousin's and his family. Plus, Dustin Tanner just sounds good together.

It was quite the process getting everything done to change my name. First, I had to get a money order to pay for the name change and criminal check.  Yes. Criminal check. They need to be sure I am not hiding from a crime or debt and shit like that. Next, I had to go to City Hall to pay the fingerprint fee. Then to The Government building to get a statement notarized  To make sure I knew what I was doing. THEN, I finally got to go to the RCMP and get my fingerprints done. They only do them for these things on Tuesday mornings and Thursday afternoons. So I had to re schedule a couple of times before I finally got it all done.

When I get my paperwork  and my new birth certificate  I get to run around and spend more money getting my drivers license changed. And my bank accounts. And payroll at work. And my investment account. And the paperwork for my new apartment. Though I think that will be filled in as Dustin from the beginning.

Oh yes. I have decided to move. Not out of Fort St John. Because believe it or not, I like it here. It is home for me. I am moving apartments. I have had enough of this place. The twice yearly floods of my closet, the dirty yard and parking lot, the dirty laundry room with machines that don't work, the dirty hallways. Enough is enough. If they want to raise my rent, I might as well move someplace cleaner and better maintained. I am only moving about half a block away but it feels like the side of the city. They are loft style apartments, with a downstairs and an upstairs. I may not have a bedroom door but at least I won't feel like my guests are sitting in my bedroom. Not sure if I will be able to fit all my stuff in there. I guess it will another purge for me. I need to go through my store room and closet here before I move. I am sure there will be a lot of stuff I can get rid of. I know I have clothes to get rid of. and boxes of paperwork I can shred.

The new place will also be good for the cats. The food will be upstairs. The litter box will be downstairs. So Fidget will have to go up and down to eat and,, well,, you know. She may hate me at first but in the end it will good for her.

So the cute nugget I met a while back. "K". We have been in almost constant contact. Texts. Calls. Skype. And it has paid off. She will be here in 3 more sleeps for our first face to face visit. I am so excited! It has been a long time since,,,,well,,,,you know. I hope it goes well. I promise to let you know.

Work has been really good. I have been called Dustin all week and it makes me so very happy. Even customers are asking for Dustin now. It is so great! I even got an apology from you know who. A true, heartfelt one. I was quite surprised. But I took it. And I appreciate it. And I think it has really helped the work environment a lot.

I have also had the pleasure of spending sometime with "H" and "L" and baby "E". I love that kid!! And apparently, she loves Uncle Dustin. Loves falling asleep in my arms. And I love holding her. It calms me down and makes me relax. I guess it is the same thing I do for her.

Things are coming up roses.

Bro Code Article # 2

A Bro is always entitled to do something stupid, as long as the rest of his Bros are all doing it.

Dustin